I keep seeing an ad on TV for a new show, where a character says:
“You can’t control who you fall in love with”.
Have to say – I don’t agree.
If they are not worthy of your love, then you can definitely stop yourself falling for them!
It might not be easy. But it IS possible.
I had several boyfriends before I met and married my beloved husbear, so know from experience that while you can’t necessarily help who you are attracted to – you CAN control who you fall in love with.
You can choose to fall in love; or if you see red flags, you can choose to not take things any further.
I’m not so callous as to believe the old saying “You can fall in love with a rich man just as easily as you can with a poor one”. But it does contain a grain of truth: falling in love is not some random virus or affliction – you do actually get to have a say in it, you know!
Much as I adored the husbear, when things turned serious and he asked me to marry him, I didn’t go into it lightly (especially with one broken engagement already behind me). I didn’t want to make another mistake.
So I took my feelings out of the equation and considered this man – and our relationship – from all angles. Perhaps the most important of these: Was he a kind man? (It was a resounding YES! to that one by the way!). Would he treat me right? Were we really able to talk and connect on a deeper level? Did we have similar values and goals?
It was only after thinking these things through that we got engaged, and the rest, as they say, is history. I allowed myself to fall in love with him – and keep falling in love with him – only when I knew he was worthy of that love.
Nearly thirty-two years of marriage later, it was a good decision 🙂 .
Sure, we’ve had our moments. We’ve probably both noticed other members of the opposite sex over the years – we’re married, not dead!
But every day we choose to keep falling in love, with each other.
You really can control who you fall in love with <3 … so choose wisely!
What are you thoughts – agree? Disagree?
Tracy says
Aww you two ?
Love seeing the old photos.
Janetti Spaghetti says
I know, we’re soppy!!!
Julie journals says
Hi Janette
Just finished reading your blog ‘You control who you fall in love with.
I was touched , my journey is similar when talking about your mum , I had the same situation. I was looking for that love and security which I thought I found and even though I had those doubts looming in my mind I ignored and got married. 26 years later I did leave and divorced at 50 starting life over as qz single woman from scratch.