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You Can’t Control Who You Fall in Love With

January 31, 2022 By Janetti Spaghetti

I keep seeing an ad on TV for a new show, where a character says:

“You can’t control who you fall in love with”.

Have to say – I don’t agree.

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If they are not worthy of your love, then you can definitely stop yourself falling for them!

It might not be easy. But it IS possible.

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I had several boyfriends before I met and married my beloved husbear, so know from experience that while you can’t necessarily help who you are attracted to – you CAN control who you fall in love with.

You can choose to fall in love; or if you see red flags, you can choose to not take things any further.

I’m not so callous as to believe the old saying “You can fall in love with a rich man just as easily as you can with a poor one”. But it does contain a grain of truth: falling in love is not some random virus or affliction – you do actually get to have a say in it, you know!

Much as I adored the husbear, when things turned serious and he asked me to marry him, I didn’t go into it lightly (especially with one broken engagement already behind me). I didn’t want to make another mistake.

So I took my feelings out of the equation and considered this man – and our relationship – from all angles. Perhaps the most important of these: Was he a kind man? (It was a resounding YES! to that one by the way!). Would he treat me right? Were we really able to talk and connect on a deeper level? Did we have similar values and goals?

engagement photo

It was only after thinking these things through that we got engaged, and the rest, as they say, is history. I allowed myself to fall in love with him – and keep falling in love with him – only when I knew he was worthy of that love.

Nearly thirty-two years of marriage later, it was a good decision 🙂 .

me and him fave

Sure, we’ve had our moments. We’ve probably both noticed other members of the opposite sex over the years – we’re married, not dead!

But every day we choose to keep falling in love, with each other.

You really can control who you fall in love with <3 … so choose wisely!

What are you thoughts – agree? Disagree?

Filed Under: Relationships

About Janetti Spaghetti

My real name is Janet Camilleri, and I love to write. Janetti Spaghetti is my third or maybe fourth blog ... but who's counting?

You can also follow Janetti Spaghetti on Facebook and Instagram!

Comments

  1. Tracy says

    February 2, 2022 at 12:04 pm

    Aww you two ?
    Love seeing the old photos.

  2. Janetti Spaghetti says

    February 9, 2022 at 9:24 am

    I know, we’re soppy!!!

  3. Julie journals says

    February 16, 2022 at 11:31 am

    Hi Janette
    Just finished reading your blog ‘You control who you fall in love with.

    I was touched , my journey is similar when talking about your mum , I had the same situation. I was looking for that love and security which I thought I found and even though I had those doubts looming in my mind I ignored and got married. 26 years later I did leave and divorced at 50 starting life over as qz single woman from scratch.

Janet Camilleri Welcome to the world of Janetti Spaghetti! Perhaps we've already met - after all, I've been blogging for over ten years now. You may remember me from such blogs as Middle Aged Mama, Redland City Living or Footprints. I must be the master (mistress) of re-invention because here I am again! Here at Janetti Spaghetti, I'm blogging purely for the love of it - and I hope you enjoy reading, as much as I enjoy the writing. So grab a cuppa, get comfy, and come join me on the journey. Who knows where we will end up?!

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